Romans
12:9-21 Let love be without
hypocrisy. Abhor what is evil. Cling to what is good. Be kindly
affectionate to one another with brotherly love, in honor giving preference to
one another; not lagging in diligence, fervent in spirit, serving the
Lord; rejoicing in hope, patient in tribulation, continuing steadfastly in
prayer; distributing to the needs of the saints, given to hospitality. Bless
those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. Rejoice with those who
rejoice, and weep with those who weep. Be of the same mind toward one
another. Do not set your mind on high things, but associate with the humble. Do
not be wise in your own opinion. Repay no one evil for evil. Have regard
for good things in the sight of all men. If it is possible, as much as
depends on you, live peaceably with all men. Beloved, do not avenge
yourselves, but rather give place to wrath; for it is written, “Vengeance is Mine,
I will repay,” says the Lord. Therefore “If your enemy is hungry,
feed him; If he is thirsty, give him a drink; For in so doing you will heap
coals of fire on his head.” Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil
with good.
This
week, our Wednesday evening small group continued its topical study of the
Louie Giglio “Relat(able)” series. Pastor Giglio says that we all have a mental picture on our
mind of the kind of friend that we want. We know what kind of people we want
around us in life. But the real goal is to become that kind of friend
that we want around us in life, and if we can do that, we are going to get the
benefits. You may not get a friend today, but you can become one; and life
always begins with “becoming”. Rather than “finding”. It’s not about finding
the “right” person in life; it is about "being" the person that God wants you to
be. That way, whether you find new relationships or not, you shall “win”
because you are becoming the person that God wants you to become. If we focus
on this truth, then God will help us along the way.
Matthew
22:37-40 Jesus said to him, “‘You
shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul,
and with all your mind.’ This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like it: ‘You shall
love your neighbor as yourself.’ On these two commandments hang all the
Law and the Prophets.”
There
are six principles that are true about the friend that we all long for. What
does that look like when you break it down into the flow? The opening Bible
passage says that love must be sincere.
The 1828 Webster’s dictionary defines the word “sincere” as: Pure; being in
reality what it appears to be; not feigned; not simulated; not assumed or said
for the sake of appearance; real; not hypocritical or pretended. No prayer can
avail with a heart-searching God, unless it is sincere. Pastor Giglio defines “sincere”
in common terms as “not phony”, not a hypocrite and no hidden agendas. The
first friend that we long for principle (and our challenge) is: (1) we need to be “one-faced”
friends with no hidden agendas. We are never going to be a one-faced
friend of we do not get God’s approval; if we do not agree with God that we are
somebody of great value and not starting to repair our core-relationships in
life. The reason that we are “two-faced” friends is because we want acceptance
from people. We tell one person one thing and we tell another person another
thing in order to bolster our position in a situation. This is why, a lot of
times, we celebrate conflict and not try to minimize conflict, because conflict
gives us the ability to raise our equity with certain relationships around us. Meaning,
that whenever there is a conflict, there is an opportunity to strengthen our
position with certain people.
The
second friend that we are looking for principle is: (2) we need to
be friends who extinguishes evil and celebrates good. The opening
Bible passage says “Hate what is “evil” and cling to what is “good”. The 1828
Webster’s dictionary defines the word “evil” as: Corrupt; perverse; wrong. Evil is natural or moral. Natural evil is anything
which produces pain, distress, loss or calamity, or which in any way disturbs
the peace, impairs the happiness, or destroys the perfection of natural beings.
Moral evil is any deviation of a moral agent from the rules of conduct
prescribed to him by God, or by legitimate human authority; or it is any
violation of the plain principles of justice and rectitude. The 1828
Webster’s dictionary defines the word “good” as: Having moral qualities best adapted to its design and use, or the
qualities which God's law requires; virtuous; pious; religious; applied to
persons, and opposed to bad, vicious, wicked, evil. Conformable to the moral
law; virtuous; applied to actions. So, out of our relationship with God, we
can reflect this “goodness” in the relationships that we have with other
people.
Matthew
7:12 “Therefore, whatever
you want men to do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the
Prophets.”
When
a conversation arises, there is always going to be an opportunity to celebrate
what is evil and race right by what is good. This is how gossip happens. This
is how fights begin. This is how small things become big deals. This is how
minor issues escalate into relationship breaking events. The reality for all of
us is that a lot of the relationships that we are in today which are “sideways”
didn’t begin as a giant issue. They began as a series of little things. In some of the relationships that are
sideways today, we still, to this moment, really do not know all of the reality
of what actually happen to begin the conflict. We just jump into the situation,
where we did the opposite of what we want our friends to do to us. We want our
friends to celebrate “good’ and detest what is “evil”.
Let's continue this message on "being the friend that we long for" in the next post.
In Christ, Brian
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